If you are planning on adopting a child, your extended family might not be too happy about it. They might overlook the fact that you are brightening someone else's life and giving them a chance at having more opportunities than they would have had otherwise. They might just focus in on the fact that the child is not yours biologically and is therefore not the right choice. The adoption process might be stressful for you, so not having the support of your extended family might be very difficult for you. Here are some tips for dealing with your family members that are not supportive of your adoption efforts.
1. Don't Interact With Them About It
Your first step is to stop interacting with them the minute they start to say anything negative about it. As long as your partner and other children, if you have any, are accepting of the adoption, then it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. Take steps to get your extended family out of the habit of talking to you about adoption by simply cutting them off with a change of subject, hanging up, or leaving the conversation entirely any time any extended family member says anything disparaging about your choices. They might be miffed at your behavior, but this is entirely necessary for your mental health and will help you maintain a relationship with these family members by reducing the amount of resentment that you might experience due to their lack of support.
2. Cultivate Additional Support Elsewhere
If you relied on your extended family as a main source of support, start cultivating support elsewhere. Talk to a therapist, your friends, or your partner about any problems that you might be having with the adoption. By building a support system that does not rely on your extended family, you will be able to get the support you need.
3. Gather Literature
Finally, talk to the adoption agency that you are working with about the issues with your extended family. The adoption agency has likely helped people with this many times. Ask them for pamphlets and other sources of literature that you can pass out to your loved ones that might help them change their minds.
For more information, talk to your adoption agency. They will have support services that you can rely on that will allow you to get through the adoption process as easily as possible. Contact a service like ABBA Adoption for more help.
